Tuesday, November 12, 2013

A poem from my brother Joe Murphy

Back when I was in the midst of my heroin addiction my brother sent me this on Facebook. At the time when I read it, it pissed me off. Now I can look back and realize that it only pissed me off because it was the truth. Every word of it. I was mad when I first read it but I teared up a little but too and that's why...it was real emotion in verse. I hurt a lot of people throughout my addiction to opiates and heroin, including members of my own family. Including my brother Joe, who sent me this. All I can do now is say that I am sorry and that I am thankful at the same time because I am no longer that person and the experience has, if nothing else, shown me what truly matters in life. I'm thankful that I'm still here and that I still have friends and family who care and who will always be there. Anyways, here's his poem/rap/verses.. Much love and much respect to my little brother. 

Why won't you wake up, realize you fucked up, fix your mistakes and build yourself from the ground up.

You've been goin' down the wrong path, stabbin' your own family in the back, just to get a fix, well that's bullshit.

Cause' you have a family of your own, a wife and a daughter, learnin' bad habits that you have shown.

The more she grows, the more I fear, because she won't know what to do or where to go cause' of half the shit she hears.

We gave you chances, we got you help, you didn't take it so anger we felt. We try and try, we cry and cry, if you keep your bad habits you could potentially die.

I know you feel lost, like you've been double crossed, but I promise, you will be found, Just listen to the sound,

Look at your surroundings and the boundaries that your tied to, try to take a step and you'll trip dude.

I miss you bro, summers spent swimmin', jumpin' in the water, sunlight glistenin'.

Barbaque'n in the heat, cookin' us some good ass meat, just to eat, tastes that almost couldn't be beat.

I know your strugglin', I know shits tough, but you can get through it cause' I know inside you've had enough.

It must feel like your in cuffs, tied to an addiction, that you wish was just made up fiction, but listen,

Pick your self up off that bed, look in the mirror and into your head.

Look into that noggin' and find who you are, don't give up because you've gotten so far.

Think about your future, think about Maddie's too, forget about the past and the shit stuck in your head like glue.

Remember the day she was born, you looked into her eyes and you saw her grow and slowly take form, before your own eyes

It's four years later, that little angels growin' up thinkin' you fuckin' hate her.

I don't know whats on your mind, but please realize that its time, to stand up, man up, love your little girl, be her god damn world,

Protect her from guys like you, and all the bad things that you do.

All the negativity is going to destroy her potential, to live a life that's actually beneficial.

The world might have crumbled down on you, but you can build it back up, yeah just you.

All you need is an able body and a strong mind, pick up a thousand pieces and you'll do that shit in no time.

Then be a king, and Maddie can be your princess, Kalena can be your queen.

I've chosen to speak out, because I'm tired of thinking about, you hurting Mom, you hurting Grandma, cause' someday they'll both be gone.

You'll have nothing, besides an empty gut feeling, and you'll feel like someones stealing every last bit of your lifes meaning.

Heres a second chance, from me to you, pull up them pants and put a belt on, raise your daughter right cause' before you know it she'll be gone,

Llove your wife, and make her feel special, cause' in this world you only have one life.

Easily ended with the blade of a knife, but you can forget that shit and take that knife, sharpen it twice, and stab the Fuck out of anyone who tinkers with your life.

The future is constant, so get the right Mindset, and get your shit together before the sun sets.

Deep down man we all love you, look inside and your heart will show you, a road to victory, a path to success, a new beginning cause' this ones was just a test.

Take a deep breathe, and lie your soul to rest, clean up yourself, your a damn mess, see the sun shining, yeah, its for you.

See the blue sky, do you wonder why its not cloudy, cause' we want you to see clearly, because your nearly dead, sounds messed up, but the truth is the truth and enough is enough.

Follow the light, burning so bright, enhance your life and make things right.

No matter how long it takes, we'll be here for you, your family, we love you, Johnny Murphy Jr.

1 comment:

  1. I'm so glad that's no longer your world,no longer our world.